I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I fucked her ex bc she fucked mine but now we're cool and I'm watching her dog this weekend
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
how does that bad decision feel?
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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