i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
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