What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Randomize
