I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
He seemed genuinely disappointed when I told him I wasn't going to make out with him to Bring Me To Life by Evanescence so I feel like I've pinpointed the breaking point of this relationship
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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