Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
My bra broke.... so I Macguyvered that shit together with floss
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize