she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
First you say "it can't get any worse" and the next thing you know you've shat yourself on Christmas Eve.
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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