stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
accomplished twins. life is a go
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
My new dentist just kinda stared at me when I told him that I used to have partial dentures after breaking 2 teeth while beating the shit out of someone, until I puked them into the toilet and flushed them after getting high and making myself undercooked mac and cheese.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
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