You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I actually want to work out for some reason... I think it's my brains way of telling me it doesn't like living in a fat body.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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