but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Randomize
