Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
My legs r really sober for running now
I don't think that's how sobriety works.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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