Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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