At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
either way he was missing a nipple.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
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