when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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