never play flip cup with pint glasses
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
He was drinking hot tub water because i refused to get him a glass of water...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
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