Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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