I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
i caught the condom in my mouth.. dont ask me how
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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