Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
her wearing orange crocs at the bar was definitely a great form of contraception
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
Surveying the reception hall and I'm fearing the worst possible thing that could ever happen...this might be a dry wedding.
.,.,you might have to leave
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
Randomize
