Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they set my background as his mugshot to remind me "having a big penis won't be a valid excuse in a court room."
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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