speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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