Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
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