Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I mean.. listen to "Put It In My Mouth" and you'll get the gist of my voicemail for you.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize