All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
