I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
Is it because I queefed?
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
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