ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
It's barely past noon, how am I already talking about double penetration
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
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