Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You FaceTimed me at three in the morning while you were peeing. Your eyes were glazed over and you showed me your bellybutton.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
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