everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
She told me I should be a condom model.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize