All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
