once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
