Texts From Last Night

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  (505): View more from New Mexico

  We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  The Rock won.

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  (505): We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive. (505): The Rock won. http://tfl.nu/hvm5
  Replies (32) Good night (638) Bad night (913)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk

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  (330): when i say i joined a midget dating site why do u assume i was drunk http://tfl.nu/57qd
  Replies (7) Good night (1637) Bad night (1825) Order T-Shirt
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  (353): View more from

  I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing

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  (353): I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing http://tfl.nu/a43r
  Replies (41) Good night (5511) Bad night (1710) Order T-Shirt
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  (904): View more from Florida

  I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.

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  (904): I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/1lds
  Replies (12) Good night (876) Bad night (3901) Order T-Shirt
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters

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  (918): There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters http://tfl.nu/8485
  Replies (83) Good night (11190) Bad night (1765) Order T-Shirt
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.

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  (224): update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories. http://tfl.nu/22b8
  Replies (6) Good night (1848) Bad night (1270) Order T-Shirt
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  (760): View more from California

  if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel

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  (760): if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel http://tfl.nu/4p3k
  Replies (6) Good night (2909) Bad night (1046) Order T-Shirt
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.

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  (814): I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that. http://tfl.nu/oxuc
  Replies (3) Good night (1393) Bad night (675) Order T-Shirt
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.

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  (240): YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN. http://tfl.nu/d5pr
  Replies (12) Good night (2312) Bad night (480) Order T-Shirt
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.

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  (201): I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free. http://tfl.nu/mbnk
  Replies (4) Good night (2351) Bad night (723) Order T-Shirt
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  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?

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  (774): Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is? http://tfl.nu/utv4
  Replies (7) Good night (1208) Bad night (307) Order T-Shirt
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  (903): View more from Texas

  On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs

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  (903): On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs http://tfl.nu/pggr
  Replies (1) Good night (780) Bad night (256) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.

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  (512): You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor. http://tfl.nu/8xpn
  Replies (1) Good night (985) Bad night (234)
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  (616): View more from Michigan

  what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?

  (1-616): View more from Michigan

  i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.

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  (616): what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place? (1-616): i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day. http://tfl.nu/ba7u
  Replies (2) Good night (779) Bad night (168)
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  (917): View more from New York City

  i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON

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  (917): i made this one couple from ohio so uncomfortable that they left....and that was WHEN I HAD PANTS ON http://tfl.nu/vk8e
  Replies (5) Good night (610) Bad night (399) Order T-Shirt

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