If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
i just remembered that i did the "single ladies" dance ON THE BAR...fuck you slippery nipples i curse the day i discovered you
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
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