If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
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