you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
I remember telling you that I think Taylor Swift has stolen my essence. I still think that's true.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
