you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
can u get pink eye on your cock?
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
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