in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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