Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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