Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
Apparently the guy with the moaning gf that lives above us is in my DES class... AWKWARD
Randomize