Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
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