Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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