I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
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