I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.