Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
I tried to throw up out of my window but I forgot there was a mesh screen.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
