I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
Part of my treatment is getting high and having sex with 22 year olds. I have a prescription!
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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