Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I just faked an interview like I fake a fucking orgasm. Wonder if these candidates can tell I'm a tired and hungover recruiter?
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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