Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
It'll be a Christmas-Fucking-Miracle if we get through the ceremony without a groomsman vomming
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
how does that bad decision feel?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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