Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
i regret nothing
brb throwing up in the dishwasher
i regret everything
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
