My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
how the hell did we fit 12 drunk lesbians in your car?! I felt like we were playing lesbian tetris last night.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
It's like if a cloud had tits and you laid on them.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
