So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
His uber religious wife caught us having anal sex in their bed..... she called us sodomites. Can you even be a sodomite if you're a girl?
You're not a sodomite. You're a whore. Tell her to get the insults right. Did she try to save you with Jesus?
She said she'd pray for me. Man, if I had just caught my husband balls deep in some ho, I'd say fuck the praying and kick her ass.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
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