did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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