if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
My makeup looks extraordinary for nine tequila shots, running four blocks, falling asleep with my face in the toilet, and doing the walk of shame across campus in the rain. And to think I'm single.
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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