Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
Every person I've ever had sex with is in Chipotle right now.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
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