I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Randomize
