i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
I should be sponsored by Trojan
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
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