I just called a child with a Yankees jersey a jerkoff. so much for a friendly day @ the ballpark
You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
Randomize
