looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Woke up this morning buried in a mountain of chex mix and bubble wrap. We must have been doing something great last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
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